Tinsel and Tat

The focus on recycling has allowed we Scrooge’s to take the moral high ground in recycling.

In addition to the need to reduce the use of plastics, glitter is a distinct no-no for the recycling guys. So are ribbons, foil coverd wrapping paper, fancy self adhesive bows and battery driven musical Christmas cards. These all cost lots and appear on the shopping list just at the wrong time of the financial year. Wheras it is judicious to buy Aunty Mabel a pressy and maintain your potential position in her will there is something quite wrong in forking out for fancy wrapping.

Firstly only three percent of the population have any realistic chance to make a half decent job of wrapping the parcel without bumps, lumps and giving the appearance of pre used scrunched paper. The damn bows always manage to be stuck in a less than ideal location, and now you forgot to stick the bow on top of the gift card so need an additional stretch of sellotape.

Then you can relax safe in the knowledge that Aunty Mabel, whom we love dearly (see will issue) will rip the wrapping off in under two seconds, scrunching it up and chucking it aside in a heap whilst the gift is rapidly analysed for shape, colour, smell, being age appropriate and befitting her status. 

These are the more important elements of the assessment of your worthiness to be in the will rather than the wrapping. 

Thus all the effort spent buying wrapping paper and wrapping presents vapourises in a flash. Your job is to wander about collecting the residue and sorting it into its recycling potential, having first checked and rechecked there was no key components, small gift or voucher left in the paper. Then you can relax having stuffed the waste in the appropriate bin before sitting in wonderment that the functional lifespan of the wrapping is measured in nano seconds.

But salavation appears to be imminent. The recycling guys are making their mark. Unprinted cardboard and brown paper are the be easiest to be recycled. Apart from the energy consumed during the process presents wrapped in second hand brown paper and tied up with edible string is the route ahead, hang on there is song about this! And we would save a fortune, bah humbug.

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