It’s Just Not Cricket

on March 30 | in Obscura | by | with No Comments

Maybe just me but is the rest of the world also getting a tad tired of the news of ball tampering in cricket. Seems the solution is simple to a fool like me. The umpire chappies should check the ball after each over, and be the only guys to allowed to clean the ball, like the umpires in snooker. Job done. This would also reduce the laundry bill to remove the red streaks from bowlers pants, so an ecological saving on energy and washing powder.

Bending the rules is de rigour in many team games. I imagine the Kiwi Hakka at the start of New Zealand rugby games is not designed to be all that friendly in a do have a cup of team and current bun kind of way. The UK university boat race of last weekend in which Cambridge trounced Oxford, not that I support Cambridge you understand, was subject of some ace tactics, if you support Cambridge, and dastardly deeds if your are an Oxford person.

The tactic is to steer the leading boat across the path of the other, once clear of each other of course. This creates “dirty water”, turbulence being a better term, in which the opposing, lagging boat has to row through thereby loosing the aquatic version of traction. All jolly hockey sticks. It’s not as if it was a race between two other uni’s, whom we can’t name who wouldn’t necessarily wait until they were clear. This would create a ramming incident the equivalent of the Vikings and worth talking about.

Back to the Aussie cricket chaps and ball fondling. This has been the subject of news overload; double page spreads, interviews, TV footage, resignations, condemnations that are way overloaded. The guys bent the rule in a game that hasn’t had the wit to prevent it. Presumably the rule guys will come up with a solution, in the meantime what do we do every time there is a sneaky forward pass, offside, hidden foul, a little shove in all the other sports. Perhaps the Aussie guys should be recognised as hero’s for trying to get away with it. It’s all about tactics isn’t it?

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